yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
