Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
soo... how was my night?
Randomize