do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize