i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
