I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
