And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Randomize