I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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