Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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