Michael Bay diarrhea
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Randomize
