Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Randomize
