i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I booty called her while she was in labor.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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