I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize