I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
