Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Randomize