I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
