too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Randomize
