If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
