I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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