I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
