he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
