chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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