Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
