Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
