Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
