Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
