If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize