I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
please don't ironically join a cult
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