You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
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