would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
