He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
