he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Randomize
