He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize