All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
