using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
