shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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