So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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