She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
