Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
