For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Come see our sink grown plant.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize