Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
now i know why i became what i already was.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
