i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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