Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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