S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize