connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
The air was thick with penises
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
