i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
