so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
