Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize
