I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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