how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
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