Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
